Driverless Taxis: Coming to a Freeway Near You?

Waymo's Self-Driving Cars on Freeways? Yeah, That's Gonna End Well...

So, Waymo's finally letting its robotaxis loose on the freeways. Waymo taxis are coming to Los Angeles and Bay Area freeways Great. Just what we needed: AI trying to navigate LA traffic. What could possibly go wrong?

The Freeway to Hell (or Just Gridlock)

They’re saying it’ll "attract new customers" because people can go longer distances. Waymo taxis are coming to Los Angeles and Bay Area freeways Oh, I'm sure it will. Nothing says "relaxing ride" like trusting your life to a software program that probably still gets confused by lane markings.

Let's be real, LA freeways are already a Darwinian experiment in human aggression and questionable decision-making. Throw in a bunch of self-driving cars programmed to be "safe" and "reliable," and you've got a recipe for the slowest-moving traffic jam the world has ever seen.

And don't even get me started on the inevitable glitches. Remember that time Waymos were getting punked by kids in San Francisco who figured out how to make them stop in the middle of the road? [Waymo’s Self-Driving Cars Hit NYC Streets, Sparking Concerns for Taxi Drivers] Now imagine that happening on the 405 during rush hour.

It's funny, they act like this is some huge innovation, but aren't these the same guys who've been promising us flying cars for the last 50 years? Where are those, huh? Still stuck in traffic, I guess.

The Human Cost of Automation

But it's not just about traffic, is it? This is about jobs. Real people's livelihoods. Waymo's already messing with taxi drivers in San Francisco [Waymo’s Self-Driving Cars Hit NYC Streets, Sparking Concerns for Taxi Drivers], and now they're setting their sights on LA. We're talking about an industry that's already been gutted by Uber and Lyft, and now this.

"They say driverless cars are the future," said Pedro Acosta, an IDG member, "but for people like me, they mean no future at all." [Waymo’s Self-Driving Cars Hit NYC Streets, Sparking Concerns for Taxi Drivers]

Exactly!

And what about the immigrants who rely on driving jobs to make ends meet? Close to 90% of taxi drivers and chauffeurs are immigrants in New York City. [Waymo’s Self-Driving Cars Hit NYC Streets, Sparking Concerns for Taxi Drivers] Are we just gonna throw them all out on the street so some tech company can make a few extra bucks?

I mean, I get it. Progress and all that. But at what cost? Are we really willing to sacrifice human beings for the sake of...slightly less traffic? (Doubtful).

Offcourse not.

New York State of...Denial?

And speaking of throwing people out on the street, let's not forget what's happening in New York. Waymo’s trying to get its cars fully autonomous there, but they need to convince the state to change its laws. Waymo’s Self-Driving Cars Hit NYC Streets, Sparking Concerns for Taxi Drivers Good luck with that. Especially with Zohran Mamdani as mayor, the guy who went on a hunger strike to help taxi drivers.

But hey, Waymo's got lobbyists, right? [Waymo’s Self-Driving Cars Hit NYC Streets, Sparking Concerns for Taxi Drivers] They're paying them over a hundred grand to schmooze with DOT officials. So, yeah, democracy in action.

Then again, maybe I'm just being a grumpy old Luddite. Maybe self-driving cars are the future. Maybe they'll solve all our problems and usher in a new era of peace and harmony.

Nah.

This Ain't Progress, It's Just a Different Kind of Mess